CONTENTS Introduction you still go there just dont let them punish you A Subtlety 1 Don't constrain me to improve my character! 3 Freedom That Shame Cries Out 5 Improve myself, so I can escape from 8 punishment. My Spoiled Complaints about the Power to 11 Cultivate Sense of Shame 12 That Room 14 Poems for Vulnerability 16 An Unimportant Issue 26 Do you know we have a lower suicide rate 28 Partial Summary and Suggestion of All I Post 29 Some stuff related to my experience 31 Part of the Thing 34 We'll call that a freedom 35 I really don't know how to explain many things. 37 A Wish 39 Random Things 40 A Thing About How Culture of Shame Works 42 Psyche 44 BDSM Novels by Chinese Middle School 45 Students Why can reflection sometimes be used to 48 defend freedom? 2 Situations 49 Permission 50 Very Unimportant 51 Snapshot of a part 52 Additional Explanation 54 More Info 56 Important Info 57 More Info 1 58 More Info 2 59 Stuff 1 60 Stuff 2 62 Stuff 3 64 Words 1 65 Words 2 66 Words 3 67 Words 4 68 Words 5 69 Words 6 70 Words 7 71 Words 8 72 Words 9 73 Words 10 74 Words 11 75 Words 12 76 Words 13 77 Words 14 78 Words 15 80 A Sign 82 How does multiculturalism relate to freedom? 85 (part of the story) When Retailing Can Express an Objection 89 A Part of Rebelliousness 91 When criticism turns back into information/ 94 advice "Learning state" and conservatives 95 Why cultures are immoral 96 Why did we hate conservatives in the first 97 place? "Adapting to Society" 98 Anger as Punishment 99 Traditional Culture 100 Orgasm 103 It's not lack of innovation; it's called insanity. 104 "Live in the moment" 106 Before Dinner 108 Left-handedness and disobedience 109 What are people arguing about when arguing 112 about optimism and pessimism INTRODUCTION A person may feel that the entire world is available to scold him, spur him on, and improve his character. I don't mean that the world is not easy to survive in so he feels the need to strive. But everything in the world is an inspirational story and something that can make him feel ashamed. People who are better than him are role models, people who are worse than him are warnings, people who are luckier than him are the reasons for his efforts, and people who are less fortunate than him make him aware of his privileges. Pink is the color of pigs, who lose their lives but become an excuse for self-indulgent humans; orange is the color of the sun, which sacrifices its own fuel to shine. The movement of every water molecule on Earth is an inspirational story, not to mention the toil of waterworks workers. Religion, traditional culture, and inspirational slogans in the gym are just a drop in the ocean using this encyclopedia. To demand that a person have the same ideology as you just because they live within many kilometers V of you and pay taxes to the same government, I find it hard to understand why anyone would find that necessary. Then again, I'm seeking your approval here, and you're even further away, elsewhere on this ball, except I don't feel like I'm applying pressure. When I run into some other people who are also pressuring others, then it will be possible that I'll be pressuring them not to do that, even though they are near you, or as far away as you are. This article is not much of a doctrine. The thing is merely that it is more or less subject to your choice if you choose to read it and it makes you feel better in the moment, or it gives you some tools to persuade others, or you are persuaded by me, or you at least become aware of other possibilities because of it. VI YOU STILL GO THERE JUST DONT LET THEM PUNISH YOU school is bad you should do homeschooling you still go there just dont let them punish you just only do homework and classes you think useful dont let teachers punish you talk with ur parents about it try it some people dont try that. people think if a child tastes freedom then they'll be bad. try it At Least Try It VII Give it some time. We cannot allow schools to continue. Adults have forgotten what it's like to be in school, the rules, the discipline, the motivational speeches, the scary atmosphere, and not a single person thinking "You are always allowed to make decisions for yourself without shame. You can leave this room at will." It's not just a matter of reducing workload and school time; people are just playing on their phones after school, hiding from trauma and feelings of selfdoubt. Kids are adults, and the worst kids are adults who happen to drink too much. People need to stop thinking reflexively of school, of "the habit and spirit of discipline," of reprimands and punishments. People should study at home and maybe go to some near-random classes on some near-random days just out of necessity and without threat of punishment. You should just hold the other person, ask him what learning content he thinks will be useful to him, ask him how he is feeling recently, remind him to do something he really needs to do, lie next to him playing on his phone, and ask him "Do you want me to remind you?" You give a lot, but you are his roommate, a really close roommate. If you really become his roommate, he will love you naturally. If people have to know math or something before going to college, then just study a few more years before going to college, or just skip a lot of stuff that is useless and you don't want to learn. VIII A SUBTLETY He said character education depends on how old you are. I don't know what he was referring to. If he was referring to propaganda for altruism, that's one thing. Or, he was referring to the publicity given to you in a situation that you are willing to accept, which is also one thing. However, if you are not willing to accept, for example, the school conducts motivational lectures, does it mean that if the student is young, you can demand students to listen to it; You feel ashamed, or feel something else, and, you don't want to go, does it mean that if you are young, the school may not allow you not to listen; Does it mean this kind of motivational lecture can be mandatory for young people just like homework. I don't know what he thinks. What worries me about this is that what I hate, is treated as something that can be conditionally accepted, even as something that people have the right to hate and leave, but have no right not to suffer at all. This thinking, first of all, is a compromise in terms of duration. Second, if you demand that people have to go through it before they can hate and leave, then you are only allowing the act of hating and leaving, not the content what people are opposing. You may be thinking, what if people are forced to think about it and accept it? But if you think so, you can't tell those who oppose it that you support them. If you think they hate and leave too eagerly, then you can say so. You can't first say that you support them, and then say that you don't actually support their content, just feel that the hateful behavior (strictly speaking, attitude) is supported by you. DON'T CONSTRAIN ME TO IMPROVE MY CHARACTER! why bad posture isnt that bad - YouTube https://youtu.be/S9-sN608J4E maybe it's just reminding you of the old days when you were young, others were controlling you and you didn't have much pressure to survive or a chance to change the fact that you were controlled so you gave up and it strangely made you feel better because you gave up and stopped i'll go a bit further and say that the psychological good can probably be achieved by other ways. thinking about annoying things or you actually improved your character into a state of embracing others' control partly for your own good. is it a good way to control yourself? it's your choice. but the point is, if you become a constrainer someday, you're trying to constrain others partly for their own good, it's the demand of freedom to constrain no more than the behavior itself. no try to improve character, or you call it psychology or anything. at its most fundamental level, freedom has nothing to do with whether you strive for it or how you view other people's attempts to improve your character. freedom is only about how you are constrained. FREEDOM THAT SHAME CRIES OUT As a child, I used to find proverbs and life lessons interesting, but some of them were impolite in their wording, which I didn't like. Now, my aversion towards them is due to teachers and language exam texts using them as tools to criticize others. In elementary school, we had to memorize these proverbs, which added to my dislike of them, but that's a minor reason. Freedom is a huge burden, and even the most responsible and disciplined people must quickly get rid of it so they won't be criticized or humiliated by those around them or strangers online. I don't like inspirational articles because they often use impolite language and phrases such as "People should" and "You should." They rarely ask readers about their dreams, but instead demand that readers work hard and pursue their dreams, so selfdisciplined that regardless of whether they achieve them or not. This suggests that these articles are consumer goods. You're expected to be everyone's life coach, targeting random readers, so what you write is naturally a consumer good. Some people seem to finally be treating these articles as a commodity. If someone wants to find someone to monitor their progress or criticize them, they can read these articles, if not, they can avoid them. I've never trusted these articles because I'm not at the point where I need to find random people to be my life coach, not even in elementary school, when I only trusted my teachers. I'm lazy, and I don't want to mess with anyone. Why should a stranger criticize me? These popular articles are the same as either teachers criticizing students, managers criticizing employees, or people criticizing themselves. I'd rather they only appear in the latter form among these three, as the other forms are disgusting, for reasons explained earlier. But if someone expects much from themself and uses phrases like "People should" or "You should" for selfimprovement, they're being too arrogant. For you, you may have a different idea. It's not important how people motivate others, but they should be allowed to easily leave others' admonishment. This includes the consumer goods mentioned earlier, may also contain the people who constrain you as work (such as teachers), and may even also include people who genuinely care about you. School-arranged lectures, meetings, and teachers' admonitions to students are often situations that are not easy to leave. They use your GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME shame or self-contradiction to try to restrict and improve your character. Some people can't leave and choose to accept, while others can't leave and choose to be mad. I'm afraid I belong to the latter and don't want to be the former and then be stronger. Those who accept, despite changing themselves, still have their freedom. I lost my freedom because I made a bad choice of not using other people's words to sharpen myself, but I still believe that, even if I remain my incredible laziness and fragility, I'm still worth my freedom, so they're still wrong. IMPROVE MYSELF, SO I CAN ESCAPE FROM PUNISHMENT. In fact, sometimes my classmates are in order to avoid punishment, according to the teacher, improve their personality, become stronger, and turn the humiliation of others into motivation. After graduating, after a few years, it changed back. Although changing back is not necessarily a good thing, the ability to choose to change back is certainly a good thing. They will say, this is "what kind of age to do what kind of thing". But whether they stay strong or become vulnerable, they can choose to oppose what they go through. A person can remain strong and grow up without being affected by any bad influence from the education he has experienced, but not thinking that others should GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME go through the education they have experienced, simply because it feels bad in itself is not a worthy opportunity for character improvement. One can experience something that makes oneself better and still say that that thing is bad, and that's part of freedom. People look inward, and improving their personality is an endless thing. But how much right do people have to try to improve the personality of others against their will, especially if this personality only makes him work harder in a market economy instead of having a lot of altruism. You, as a restrained person, if you are chronically ill influenced and say that you are against such an education, even if people do not accuse you of vulnerability, they will think that the educator is just wrong in the way, not that their purpose of improving your personality is wrong. If you benefit from education in the long run, but still oppose it, you are an ungrateful. It is often said that children and adolescents have an uncertain sense of self, and when they grow up, they are determined and no longer as anxious about who they are. This statement seems to be saying that being young is the time to receive character education and improve character, and that it is the privilege of adults not to receive such education. But in fact, this thing is more like that you are in an environment that always educates you, and in an PORKIFIABLE environment where people want to restrain not only your behavior, but also your character, constantly looking inward, looking inward, actively trying to use others to improve your own character, or just to meet the demands of others without punishment to improve your own character, and eventually you can't stand it. You feel unbearable, but do you feel right or wrong about the things you've already received? MY SPOILED COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE POWER TO CULTIVATE It doesn't matter if some uncomfortable words are good for long-term mental health. The important thing is that you have no authority over it. That is what we should emphasize. As for whether saying some words will make people's psychology vulnerable at 20, strong at 30, and then alternating at a frequency of 2000Hz, and how others should treat what you say to benefit themselves and society, you have no right to manage these things. SENSE OF SHAME There is an argument here, on whether the pain worths thanking or something. Pain is not a person, so the question is really poorly-defined. I guess what the people are really arguing is that whether we should propagate something like "Struggling makes you a better person". I definitely don't like such words, as a fragile and lazy person. I hate struggling. The fact the people in a hardship struggling against the inevitable difficulties becomes the self-urging of the middle class, and a speechcraft to manage others. This is something I find difficult to accept. On another level, people in difficulties have two psychologies. Some prefer to weaken their attention to the hardship, which makes them feel better; some prefer to compassionate themselves, which makes them feel better. Controversy begins when people start to use others to urge themselves, or look for others' empathy. People with different attitudes will meet, on the internet, over an article, or inside and outside the powerpoint slides shown by some manager. A person said, rather than thank the pain, thank yourself. Another person said, the opposite of love is admiration. More or less, such words make me feel better, as a fragile and lazy person. THAT ROOM Some of the words I don't like have something to do with my personal experience. But I don't think it's just a matter of personal experience. If those words are on a website or on a bookstore shelf, that's a question of whether I choose to read them or not. But I think the problem is also that sometimes somebody talks to you, and you leave that room, or you get up and talk to them, and you have consequences. I don't think it's a free thing to do. If both rights can be realized, it is perhaps the most free. But if there is only one thing to achieve, I think the right to leave the room is more important than the right to stand up and talk to the other person. If I only have the right to oppose and not the right to leave, I may have low language skills, or my views are very simple, his views are complex, or I am not willing to spend so much energy thinking and speaking, or the other party spends a lot of money on publicity, resulting in my views taking up less space. Is it better to have a view that is linguistically competent, complex, and spent energy to think and money to promote? Unimportant. The point is that whether you are good or not, I should be allowed not to listen to you. It is problematic to speak of this as a matter of personal experience. If it's a matter of personal experience, does that mean that we can do mandatory propaganda for people who don't have such personal experience? Or is it okay to just target young children, not older people? Is it okay if it's not excessive? You can punish children, and mandatory propaganda may be less problematic. But I want to emphasize that it is inherently problematic, not that there is no problem in nature, just because the other side does not have such a personal experience. Of course there is still problem with this, and that's what "mandatory" means. I don't have personal experience, which only means that I don't dislike this matter because of personal experience, but it doesn't mean that I don't care about this matter at all. POEMS FOR VULNERABILITY You are warm and deep, deep as honey. Dip it with your finger, sticky, but transparent and clear. The sun can pass through you, and it can shine on you, golden light reflected. Or rustling grains, just slide, leave no trace, fall on my hand. Raise your arm, and you can see your flesh. Look at the sun through the edges of your fingers; It's warm-colored light. Pinch yourself, it hurts, so you shout to the person in front of you - Look, look! Look at me, I am looking into your eyes. Then, bow your head, hold onto their arm, facing away from the wind and sand, cowering together in the corner. I want you to know all my life. The appearance of splashing water in the pool, the texture of the paper under the pen tip when writing. Where does the soil on hand come from? We lean together, failed to avoid mud on the railing, but hum along with the phone's speaker, and then while looking at the clouds in the sky, I listen to your story. I flash with shame that lamps are the stars of the ancients. I'd rather just look at one, then move my gaze to the darkness next to it. O man behind the lamp, do you want to cry in front of me? Or just like me, dodge the light. Glass and steel plates, frightening me. They also blocked my crying breathing. The ancients, weren't lucky to indulge them; They only have truly painful nights. But I should have been, rushing forward and shouting. Look at the person in front, see whether they are crying.    Modern people are super lucky and lazy. But still, don't push them too hard. Stones do not leave too many traces, but it was a lonely road. The person right next to some glass shard, got comfort from the label on the glass bottle. A road traveled by one alone, knew what's inside the person. It's just a pity that the road can't speak. They didn't get an answer from it. Reverently, I remember my past. The road under the sunset shine, alone, those grey bricks, the soul, concealed by the smoothness of marble tiles. In the dark nights, further, buried questions unanswered. Wails echoing in the darkness, sadness dyed the stars in the sky. Merely, I am sad, sometimes, the stars in the night sky accidentally, in my eyes. Their light seems to be the afterglow from my sadness in the old days. AN UNIMPORTANT ISSUE Why do people worry that school isn't strict enough? If you don't think it's strict enough, you can be strict with your own kids instead of policing what other people do, can't you? So the point is that you don't have the time, so you resort to school to solve your problems. As parents' parenting time increases, schools will inevitably move towards laxity and disorganization, because those who support this change have a reason to oppose the status quo, and those who oppose it have no reason to perpetuate the status quo, unless you want to save someone else and spank someone else's parents. Some people say that schooling is about fitting in and getting along with other people, and honestly you can do that more authentically by working in your spare time as well. One of the problems with going through a simulated environment like school is that you can't be sure if what you're asking for is necessary. Maybe the reason why people need to adapt to society is the way school is now. Culture is not like science and technology; to a large extent, culture is free in its original nature; its unfreedom is artifice, and people are forcing the truth through the use of falsehood, so to say that one adapts to society through school is a very inappropriate statement. The central point is that you can't punish someone by punishing them for irresponsible behavior towards themselves in the hope that they will learn to be responsible towards others from it. That's something quite meaningless and shaming, and such a purpose is far too costly to freedom. If that's really what you're trying to educate me on, then amateur work is clearly a more truthful and respectful approach. DO YOU KNOW WE HAVE A LOWER SUICIDE RATE Other reasons include that people here are more fearful, and the society's shaming on suiciding. People believing in schools is, shall we say, stupid. They go to school six and a half days a week, 13 hours a day, face a ton of rules and punishments, and listen to motivational speeches and reprimands for two hours a day. They commit suicide and the school says it was caused by a student falling in love early and then losing it, which is, shall we say, stupid for people to believe. PARTIAL SUMMARY AND SUGGESTION OF ALL I POST Since learning is partly about acquiring ideas and partly about work, school is forced conversion and forced labor. If the government needs to regulate the economy, then it clearly should not use forced labor, but rather redistribution. A child, for example, is going to run into the middle of traffic, and his parents obviously shouldn't let him do that. But since learning is about labor, and as long as the government imposes sufficient controls on the hirers, it's not clear to me how compulsory schooling is any better than allowing a child to work at an earlier age coupled with the widely available opportunity for re-education. While it's true that the child has the financial support of his parents, and thus he may be inclined to invest too little of PORKIFIABLE his efforts in education, given the current inefficient compulsory education (think about how much of what you learn you actually use), there's still reason to believe as I do. Another thing that I think is sometimes overlooked by public opinion is that there are times when you don't wish to leave school and go to work, you may just wish to be lazier and less disciplined. People always talk about moderation, but really what's more important than striving for moderation is honoring your freedom. The problem with this matter is that if your parents can only support you for a certain long period of time, then if the academic accreditation you get during that time is not as strong as it could be, then if you want to further your studies later on, there will be no one to support you at that time. Just because I talk about these things doesn't mean that I'm internally concerned about them; I hate teachers and schools far more than these words reflect. But I'm going to fulfill my rebellious purpose, so in order to bolster the persuasive power of my propaganda, I've chosen to talk about these issues here today in a serious manner for the time being. SOME STUFF RELATED TO MY EXPERIENCE If you're an elementary or middle school student and you skip school, you'll be punished. If you run away from home, you have to support yourself. You might also be able to get hired in some places, but you might be more miserable. Even if you feel it's better than school, you're afraid you'll end up having to go back to your guardian. If you don't run away from home, your situation will largely depend on your parents. You will be severely reprimanded and punished. But once you are able to pull through, then you don't have to go back to school eventually. You can then work, which you may feel is better than school. Or, you can still take your exams and go to university. If your parents are still willing to support you financially after all this, or if you support yourself at university, then you can get a university degree and you can get a better job. Once you can't get through it and you give in and go back to school, then you will be severely punished at school for it, there will be a lot of people PORKIFIABLE claiming to uplift your character, and you will find yourself in a much more painful position than you were in before you skipped school. Suicide is also a way to convince others if you believe children should have more freedom. You can tell someone through suicide that people claimed to be helping the child but caused his death. Your death may be able to change the views of some parents to the point where they feel that schools should loosen up on their students, and your ideas about school policy can be partially realized through your suicide. The consequences of a failed suicide attempt vary from person to person. People may intensify their punishment and criticism of you, which will make you afraid to express your anger by faking suicide and more determined to kill yourself in your next suicide attempt (if any). Another possibility is that people will lessen their restraints on you and your purpose will be fulfilled. In some cases, you still don't have to go to work right away, so you get a period of relative laziness and less criticism. There is such a thing in China. A student attempts suicide by jumping off a building, and the principal shouts at the students standing on the roof, assuring them that he will not be treated harshly. After he abandons the suicide attempt, the school punishes him by making him write a review and holding a meeting to criticize him for his irresponsible GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME behavior. Some people think this is wise because the principal reduces the likelihood that he will kill himself this time by suicide by lying, while avoiding more suicide attempts with subsequent punishment and criticism (which doesn't seem to have backfired in light of China's lower suicide rate). So you can see how people think about things in a culture that is less in love with human freedom. I think what this whole thing teaches us is that while you can say that freedom is good for innovation, good for learning and working more efficiently, and even good for creating a fairer society, at the end of the day, freedom isn't valuable because of those things; freedom is a value in and of itself. PART OF THE THING Reputation and glory should be a natural expression of gratitude to others, not a design in management that urges people to work hard. One fifth of the reputation and glory people feel today is the joy of helping others, and four-fifths is to repay the shame of playing on their phones in the middle of the night during their education. None of these issues matter at the end of the day, because reputation and glory are good feelings. What I really care about is the opposite part of the matter, which is shame and the quest for discipline. WE'LL CALL THAT A FREEDOM why are those words bad they're associated with punishment and fear in my mind and human needs others' support for their opinion i guess and we all tried. i guess we all regret that we tried actually. others told us it's necessary to improve character through those words or something. and we found that it is far from necessary later. but it is too late; that sense of shame sticks in our minds and others keep using that to push us or to advocate what they think of. you can't help yourself stuck on those opinion. it's not to say that you don't want to leave. your willing is to leave. to leave now, no matter if it is for you able to leave later in your life or something. we choose not to care about that, and also it's not the truth. it's different to be scolded when you work for others and to be shamed when they say it's for your personal improvement. and we didn't choose that freely in the first place. it's a way to control yourself to not to be punished, isn't it. so, whatever. i'll say it's one's freedom to control what their ears hear. it's PORKIFIABLE pathetic, that we can't really rebel with our whole mind. but it's our willing to leave those words. and things are like that, so that's the only choice. we'll call that a freedom. so the question becomes why they say words like that in the first place. so maybe they use that to constrain us, or otherwise they'll just use more straight-forward punishment. or they don't know it sucks. they thought it is like some painless thing. and they didn't give us a choice to tell them that it sucks. like, why do you even say a word to them? you hate those teachers and you can't scold them or you'll be punished. so you can only say some soft words. and there's still a chance that you'll be punished or spied on. and they'll say they're already indulging you. and you need to say soft words so you need to be humble to try to avoid being humbled more. so what to do now. never never forget anything of these? and maybe your child or students will be shameless for their own choices? and i treat freedom as a belief. so i won't regret anything and will still believe in freedom. that is rebellious, but, like, something makes you feel bad, so you have a belief against it now. like, if you want, you can make rebellion a strong reason, right? like, only fully rational dudes aren't rebellious. but people still believe in other things. so will we, right? I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN MANY THINGS. I really don't know how to explain many things. If you are scolded and shamed everyday, and others around you are super obedient, it's hard to try to skip school, talk with your parents, to see if you can learn at home, or at least you can cut your school time, or not be punished for not finishing homework, things like that. In many times, suicide rather than these things is what comes to your mind, because you're too shameful. You are asking yourself to work like everyone around you, to always try to be more hardworking. You are so scared. You are afraid that once you work less than people around you, you'll be punished. This sense of fear is so bonded to your selfdoubt, and shame. Because theoretically, they constrain you for PORKIFIABLE your own good. This institutionalization is so disciplining, that you don't even think if you stop, whether you'll really screw yourself up. You're not doing things for your future. All you think in your heart is, "If I don't obey, then I'm vulnerable. People will shame me and punish me in order to improve my character." "Or I'm not even vulnerable. I'm just plain lazy. Someone else's job is to eliminate my laziness, and they will succeed, because no one succeeds in rebellion." I guess there are two things this has to say. First, freedom of speech is inviolable. The second is that one should be able to control what one's ears hear, which should also be counted as a kind of freedom and inviolability. A WISH I'd rather not have had food to eat rather than be punished and scolded and shamed at school if I didn't finish homework or skipped classes. I still feel the same way today. RANDOM THINGS I think a lot of people know nothing about what's going on with their children. For example, there is a saying that "specific knowledge is not important, but learning ability is important". What I hope is that people should try to minimize the constraint and punishment of their children, but instead let them try to go to work and give them ample opportunities to continue learning. Because learning is all about finding a good job, doing so minimizes the unnatural consequences for your child. But some people don't understand this sentence that way. They interpret this phrase to mean that people should strengthen the discipline of students, because even seemingly meaningless rules and punishments are meaningful in the sense of cultivating habits and improving character. If they think that's what the phrase means, they should object to it. Here's the thing. It is wrong to elevate a person's personality for the sake of his interests. Attempts to elevate a person's personality by using methods against his will for the benefit of a person are the greatest violations of freedom. You shouldn't do anything like that anyway. For example, if a child GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME wants to run into traffic, your focus should be that he can't run into traffic, and your focus should not be that you want to improve the child's personality so he doesn't run into traffic. Generally speaking, personality enhancement is a bad thing, but in principle it is better to let the child choose which way he wishes. Also, the ability to learn can be additionally mastered as you learn what you need to learn. It is foolish to force a person to develop the ability to learn. Suggestions, criticisms, and demands are not the same. Advice on learning methods does not mean that you should criticise or demand for specific learning methods, and when such suggestions become requirements, things become micromanagement. Micromanagement wastes freedom, and it's the most wrong thing to do. A THING ABOUT HOW CULTURE OF SHAME WORKS I sometimes say 13 hours, sometimes 14 hours, depending on how you count. 7:40-21:50 is 14 hours and 10 minutes, but at noon there is 1 hour and 30 minutes, at night there are 40 minutes, and if you subtract it, then it is 12 hours. If you subtract the recess, then you also subtract 85 minutes, then that's 10 hours and 35 minutes. If you say to an adult that school is 14 hours, you will definitely be criticized for overcounting your study time, lacking motivation, and not meeting their expectations of you being motivated. Sometimes, definition is an important thing because it involves how people's brains deal with the shame that someone else scolds to them. Some of you may be Americans. One example that comes to mind is that the definitions of the words "freedom", "democracy", and "republic" must be sensitive to some of you. If you're a person who is in a culture of shame, the definition of each word is sensitive, as GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME each word will be used to scold you, or be used to promote the reasons for the rules that bind you. The culture of shame is global; you can feel that. PSYCHE I spent a lot of time before I went to college to protect my freedom loving psyche from the school and contemporary Chinese culture of shame. At that time, I often lay in bed in the middle of the night, crying for an hour or two, dealing with my psyche. I won't say I regret that I didn't spend more... time? - to deal with my psyche to allow me to do more things of what was perceived as shortsighted and ungrateful but in line with my heart's quest for freedom, such as accepting a month or two of reprimands from my parents and insisting on homeschooling. Anyway, it's good to be rebellious, or just to be disobedient and try to make things in your line. I will support that. BDSM NOVELS BY CHINESE MIDDLE SCHOOL STUDENTS It is with a heart of sorrow that I write this title. I had a conflicting mood when I was in the upper grades of elementary school. I wanted to completely break away from the constraints and punishments of school attendance and homework, but I couldn't fully achieve this goal. This shouldn't have stopped me from trying to achieve this goal partially, but I didn't want to offend the teacher so that I could keep answering the teachers' casual questions at length during the lesson, preventing the lesson from proceeding quickly, and thus reducing the amount of homework of the class. Of course, there were other reasons for this. If I became that special kid who had classes two days a week, it would certainly give other students the courage to do the same, which was what I hope. PORKIFIABLE However, it could also cause the teacher to say to other students all day long, that I had good grades, which was a special case and this did not apply to students who had only a little worse grade than me. Now that I think about it, this courage was obviously more liberating for my classmates than avoiding a few words from the teacher, and I regret that I didn't do it in the first place. The other point was that I was afraid that if I made such a choice, and then my grades slipped (which would affect nothing to me, because the upper elementary school classes were useless, which I could also clearly feel at the time, also I didn't care anyway), I would have to continue to be like other classmates, and I would be banned from drawing Minecraft drawings with other classmates every day in self-study classes. But what about now? If I go back to that time now, would I ask my parents as much as possible to ask the school to remove all my study discipline? Yes. I would also insist on not going to junior high school and high school. I would study on my own, take exams, go to college. I used to be too timid, too awe of the idea that I should be constrained for my own benefit. At the time, there was no one who supported my views even in part, including people online and my classmates. Not a single teacher has ever told me that children can have the freedom to learn a little less, or more freedom to choose how and when they learn. It is GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME dangerous to talk about it, and many classmates are reprimanded and punished for talking about it. Teachers are so confident when they talk about "Useless restraint is also good for cultivating discipline and is therefore useful", and I witness they punish for many minor infractions every day. I may not have chosen to resist, but I have always chosen to oppose it. The first time I resisted, probably in the second year of junior high school, the teacher tried to talk to me in the hallway, but I just didn't stop. Chinese students are the perfect masochist. When you ask Chinese primary and secondary school students why they don't even have the opportunity to express their objections, they say that things can't change much anyway. If you tell them that we can change a little bit, they will find it too painful to discuss the matter, so say something that supports the teacher's point of view. If you ask people who have graduated from primary and secondary schools in China, they just immediately forgot what happened in primary and secondary schools, because "live in the moment". There's too much propaganda, there's too much fear, and people who hold opposing views are in a state of shame, but no one enjoys orgasm from it. WHY CAN REFLECTION SOMETIMES BE USED TO DEFEND FREEDOM? I wonder why people punish children before they even talk to them about it. Or, you come across 10 rules and you ask people why that is, and they reply the saying "You can't draw squares and circles without rules", and you ask for specific answers, and then they just say 10 other things that aren't any more specific or appropriate to your situation than that, and won't even admit "I don't know why, but I'm worried you'll screw yourself up if you're not like everyone else". Telling the truth and showing emotion is fragile, using rhetoric and tautology is powerful. Of course, the fact that it's hard for you to find a job to feed yourself gives them the most power. 2 SITUATIONS Another peculiarity of school is that it binds you not only with the punishment it reinforces you, it also binds you with the punishment it constrains others with. If the standard is set, it saves you the total amount of punishment you receive and creates the same sense of fear, but it also makes you feel trapped by yourself. It also hides the fear you feel from your constraining person. If you don't always get punished, they will think that you don't feel so bad, even though you always see others being punished and you are in fear. A child, if he does not want to be constrained, should he increase or decrease his disobedience to achieve this? If he survives a certain amount of punishment (up to the constrainers, etc.) and maintains his disobedience, then others may reduce the constraint on him (because it becomes ineffective), or they may continue to increase the constraint on him (because of anger), or even be reluctant to support him in going to a less good college because of anger and disappointment. PERMISSION People who are born in a very free environment do not understand why people would want to seek permission from friends or strangers for playing with their mobile phone for a few days. This is my ideal culture. This is not a dangerous mentality. VERY UNIMPORTANT I thought about the following. A child who strategically puts aside his quest for freedom and treats punishment as a job to make himself feel better. How's that? A child who always puts aside the pursuit of freedom and sees punishment as work. How's that? I would say that for the former, that in itself should also be his choice. For the latter, I want to take a rebellious attitude and don't want people to be like that. SNAPSHOT OF A PART What are you going to do when you have a child and you realize that he doesn't have a good relationship with you, resulting in you not knowing how he is doing and not knowing what to push him to do? Sure, you can say that you're going to stop being so intimidating and hope that he'll at least feel safe enough to tell you how he's doing. But, you could also make communication his task and force him to write 5,000 words of self-criticism, and if he doesn't write it realistically, you go ahead and punish him. Then, you tell him that he should use all the seemingly unnecessary constraints as character enhancement, sharpening his own will. Can I prove that the latter is bad? What do I mean by "good" or "bad"? I can only say, on the basis of my intuition, that the latter is still inefficient even if these factors are taken into account. But I have nothing to prove; I only argue against the latter. In fact, I'm going to go farther. I would say that 99% of the constraints placed on a child for his benefit are wrong. GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME There are other things that are similar to the "character enhancement" that I have been mentioning, such as the spirit of collectivism, the sense of collective honor, and the wisdom of traditional culture. There are intricate self-interests and altruisms, a group of people who want to be more like another group of people, less offended or "vulnerable", people who use reason as a tool of rebellion, blaming the constrainer for their inefficiency, and at the same time facing the accusations of reason against themselves, coupled with the glory of being the driving force, the shame, the sense of spectacle of a rapidly growing economy, even using rebellion as a self-flagellation (working hard to prove yourself to the teacher). Some people are strong enough to just submit and avoid the thoughts, which might make them feel better. That constrainer knows nothing, he has 0 knowledge of these things, but believes he should maintain the majesty. Communication is dangerous and it's best to just have the student write a self-criticism. ADDITIONAL EXPLANATION They say that my anger towards school and teachers is due to a lack of learning about traditional culture, and that my thinking is excessive compared to what I have studied. If I were to study traditional culture more, then many aspects of my personality could be improved, including this one. This is indeed a possibility. However, the problem is that I haven't completely neglected learning. During my elementary school years, I devoted a great deal of effort to understanding and interpreting my teachers' words and the underlying ideologies. I tried my best to persuade myself to accept these ideologies, and I believe this should be considered a form of learning. However, my ideologies haven't been shaped successfully enough to prevent me from feeling angry towards teachers and school, having suicidal thoughts, and consciously identifying issues with Western ideologies. This may be my fault; perhaps I was initially too lazy and failed to learn about traditional culture from reliable sources, relying solely on interpreting my teachers' words, which has led to my current state of mind. As for GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME any remedial measures, I am relieved that I am not currently forced to interact with those who hope to remedy the situation. MORE INFO From the perspective of society as a whole, unruly teenagers are improving social efficiency. Primary and secondary education is nothing more than vicious competition. It's like, 10% of your learning is actually useful, 90% is not. As to "You need to grind your character and adapt to following rules blabla", well, there's a natural way - part-time job. So, hell yeah, from the perspective of society as a whole, primary and secondary education is nothing more than vicious competition. It's not even vicious competition, because it's not you who actively participates in the competition, it's your teachers, school and parents. It's more like, horse racing. IMPORTANT INFO Things are always wrong on many levels. You wish you could find out what you need on your own, but you are not allowed to; You also know that many things are useless, but you are not allowed not to do them; You want to do them whenever you want, but you are not allowed; You know you can do things as long as you have a friend by your side, but they choose to punish you and make you afraid. At most, they only know to ask you to sign a contract that says you're going to get spanked. Or ask you to predict what you're going to do every day for the next 1 month, and punish you if you don't. Then you are asked to listen to a bunch of sermons, filled with their emotion that they have "discovered the truth of education" and their sense of social responsibility to improve the character of others, along with the addition of 10 rules and punishments. MORE INFO 1 If you decide that your child doesn't need to feel ashamed or blame themselves for playing on the phone at 3:00 in the middle of the night and not doing their homework, and instead take a more down-to-earth approach to these things and their problems, this decision is not "going against the grain" or "going against the nature of human". It's not like, if you give up on what current education looks like, future kids will still feel so much shame and self-blame because those things aren't caused by education. That's not how things work. These things are caused by education and you can successfully change them if you want to. MORE INFO 2 People here think it's ethical to work hard and earn more money out of it. This cannot be said to be wrong, because it is true that the extra contribution they make may outweigh the increase in their income. But I feel that the reason why people think that way is not what I just pointed out. Managers and bosses here preach a lot about the superiority of hard work to their subordinates, and people seem to be motivated by a desire to seek approval from their superiors. All I can say is that you have the freedom to seek approval from your superiors, but your superiors still don't have the right to promote a value to their subordinates. People have the right to control what their ears hear. The extreme of this view - the belief that people who don't work so hard but still support themselves are immoral - is a false view, and one that no one has the right to preach to someone who can't choose to roll their eyes and leave the room. STUFF 1 Constraints are devastating. Being forced to do one thing can cause you to be unwilling to do five things you would otherwise do yourself. You are confronted with your rebellion. Suppose you are also forced to do those five things, because anger is an uncomfortable feeling, or you still try to accept the five things you would have done, you decide to comfort your rebellion. Or, you're just thinking subconsciously. Whatever the case may be, you realize that you can convince yourself that you can study hard for the good of others and not just yourself, you can try to convince yourself that teachers and parents are your employers, and you can try to convince yourself that you wouldn't actually do those five things assuming no one is pushing you. Aware of these things frightens you, because your anger does not want to go away, and because these things may be the reason why others are willing to accept being constrained; whether consciously or not, you always inevitably ask yourself why you can't be as obedient as they are. Another reason to feel fear is that you fear that accepting them will lead you to inadvertently accept what you are not forced to do, or to miss out on ideas that can be used to try and persuade the person GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME constraining you. People criticize you every day with inadequate arguments, and you reflect on it with a hundred times the thought they did when they criticized you, so that you don't feel as bad as being criticized. Lying to yourself or not thinking enough will not make you feel good either, because (1) they will point out tomorrow where you are deceiving yourself or underconsidering (albeit in the middle of 50 criticisms with insufficient reasons), and (2) one of the main reasons why this kind of thinking makes you feel better is that you use your thinking to persuade the person who restricts you in your imagination (although this communication does not have a chance to happen), and false or insufficient reflection does not reassure you. You are basically not using your reason for your own long-term good, you are using the unimaginable amount of self-reflection for those who are not vulnerable, to protect the part of you that is rebellious and saying, 'You should be allowed to decide for yourself'. STUFF 2 I talk a lot about these things now with you, and with Americans, and less with other Chinese. Because freedom is something that is more or less respected in your part of the world. One can choose to do what he wants, even if it has some problems for him in the long run, or even in the short run - that idea is not a human convention. I go and talk to Chinese kids about this, and some of them may kick themselves for choosing to listen to my sentences and for having the ideas I tell them in their heads. It's not just that, there's a deeper difference. The Chinese are much better at avoiding angry emotions, which leads to Chinese adults not feeling rebellious even after they have been given freedom, as your adults do. What kind of people do the Chinese find most rebellious? For adults, the Chinese feel that adults who forget the past are the most rebellious, rather than those who continue their quest for freedom as children are the most rebellious. Since adults are already free anyway, forgetting the past seems like the more indulgent and careless thing to do. Rebellion is a very tiring thing for a child to do. You're tortured by anger in defense of your impulsiveness, laziness, and selfindulgence. In order to change the way adults treat GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME you, you have to use your ability to think to some extent to convince them, and even face deeper selfcontradictions. The Chinese child, being raised in a culture that excels at avoiding anger, is more likely to choose to control and try to ignore the feelings of anger, spending his free time playing video games, rather than seizing on his feelings of anger, rebelling and trying to change the way adults treat him. When I say that Chinese culture is good at avoiding anger, I don't mean that teachers don't get angry at their students. It is considered the teacher's job to be angry at students, and teachers are considered obligated to act angry even when they aren't in order to control children's thoughts and behavior. That being the case, the teacher will choose to vent anger rather than control and try to ignore it to resolve the anger. Another point I would add about anger is that Chinese culture is not only good at avoiding anger, it also emphasizes avoiding anger. If we say anger is seen by you as a willingness, then it can be said that anger is seen by the Chinese as a cost. STUFF 3 What does the first day of school look like? It's like the only chance you have to feel like you can skip school without feeling too ashamed because you haven't been reprimanded by your teacher yet. This lost opportunity makes me feel remorseful. WORDS 1 Many people know this is not the case, but they still say so. Because they are afraid that more people will commit suicide if they tell the real reason. By this ingenious way they avoided more deaths and negated the intentions of those who died. As a rebellious teenager, seeing this phenomenon, I naturally hope that people who commit suicide in the future will make things clear before they die. Because my viewpoint is similar to that of those who commit suicide. WORDS 2 Even if it is a matter of life and death, I choose not to maintain such a culture, just for the sake of the least number of deaths. WORDS 3 I guess there are two things this has to say. First, freedom of speech is inviolable. The second is that one should be able to control what one's ears hear, which should also be counted as a kind of freedom and inviolability. WORDS 4 When teachers lectured students in the front of the classroom - saying something like "Complaining is a sign of lack of discipline" - I always wished someone would kill themselves; I was just not that brave. I don't know why people support the majesty of teachers. If people are very fragile and commit suicide when they see a majestic teacher, then there will be no majestic teachers in the world. WORDS 5 Is reflection and self-awareness more painful than being punished? Why would people rather not oppose the latter than try the former? I'm not saying you should be forced by the latter to choose the former; the former can be a choice you are free to make in your natural state. We can also teach another person the skills of self-restraint through conversation, and this is far from having to be done in a forced or reprimanding and shame-filled dialog. WORDS 6 Think of it this way. When you go to school, you study 10 hours a day. If you're not constrained, you can study only what you need to, and 5 hours a day is enough. If you only need to study 5 hours a day, you don't need any punishment or reprimand. You feel now that you can't learn for 5 hours a day. That's because you're still disciplined and you feel angry and sometimes rebellious. And, even if you still need to study 10 hours a day, there are plenty of other ways to do that with no one constraining or punishing you. For example, find a friend to keep you company. Let's say, hypothetically, that you have no idea what you need to learn and therefore you need to learn 15 hours a day after you leave school. Then you just go on to school. Just, you don't need to be punished or disciplined. You skip maybe 30% of the classes freely, and you use 10*30%*1.5=4.5(hr) to remedy that. 7+4.5=11.5(hr) per day. You have just traded 1.5hr/day for freedom and still get the same result. Still, find a friend to accompany you. WORDS 7 Trying to force a child for the sake of the child is a major mistake made by human beings. The whole of our modern culture - the quest for recognition of others that is used to control our minds over the power of criticism from others, the aversion to flattery that both rebellion and self-restraint can lead to, the pleasure of criticizing others, and most of the offense and etiquette - are dangerously based on this error. WORDS 8 If you were forced to study hard, why didn't you deliberately find a less good job? It's stupid, but if people did it, parents would have no reason to push their kids. You can say that you don't need such a good job, and you can also say that you won't do that to your children again, but your words are more powerful only after you have turned down a good job. WORDS 9 Westerners talk about socialization there all day long. Do they mean that people must be both tame and rebellious or they are not normal? WORDS 10 When a parent sees that the school is having a field day, he only sees the spectacle, and the question of whether a student can choose to participate or not will never cross his mind. WORDS 11 Obedience is nothing more than avoiding the punishment of the moment, or even indulging in an inexplicable fear of being punished. By the time he expresses it anyway, or disobeys anyway, it is because his anger at you has become so painful to him that it transcends the fear of being punished. This is why there is no calm rebelliousness. WORDS 12 Individual and political freedoms should be unconditional; they should not be violated for the sake of economic development, nor should they be overridden by a majority or by the results of democratic elections. Or you'll get Singapore. Imagine you are in Singapore, where schools can whip students, demonstrations are restricted to just one place, and chewing gum is banned. Can you say that every Singaporean, for their part, chooses these things? People convince themselves to accept these things through an emphasis on rationality and discipline, but this is by no means the same as the consent and enthusiasm of BDSM participants, and there are those who refuse to convince themselves in this way. WORDS 13 Seeing the name of a school will cause more pain in your heart than seeing the name of a company. WORDS 14 There was a not very popular piece of news a couple years ago. There was a school that had a counseling office. There was a student who went there, and I'm assuming that student was expressing dissatisfaction with the school or the teachers, but there was no disobedient behavior by that student. That school punished that student for neglecting his mental health and lacking the confidence to work hard at school. Quite a few other schools noticed the news and said they wanted to 'promote' the care that the principal of the school in the news had for the student. There was a debate on the internet between those who believed that the very fact that schools have counselors in place affects students learning, and those who believed that the news shows that schools can use counselors to improve students' learning. One day, shortly after this incident, my teacher scolded the class for no apparent reason, saying that we were too fragile and that the school's leadership agreed with this, that the school was too permissive and that we should therefore accept the school's management of us. I don't know if his reprimand had anything to do with the news. Also, whenever there was news about traffic accidents or fires, or news about China's economic development, or the change of seasons, the teachers would always say, "Therefore," or "Further," we, who had been corrupted and spoiled, should be obedient and study hard. No one talked about what that meant, because talking about what it meant seemed to justify the discipline of our language teacher, who understood how to use conjunction words correctly. WORDS 15 One way the Chinese use words to make some children miserable is that they will not say that these people's objections are an opinion, or even just say that they will treat these people according to their ideas anyway. They will say that opposition is a "problem" and the solution is to discipline these people more, improve their character, change their perspective, get them to accept things so they won't object and everyone is happy in the end. The painful thing about this is that even though you are unwilling to change your perspective, they are still constantly reminding you that there is another path, and that is for you to "accept" or "improve your character." You are constantly reminded of such "other paths," and you do suffer because of your opposition to them, but this reminder does not allow you to accept it painlessly, but only increases your self-contradiction, anger, opposition, and pain. It can be said that the failure of this situation is that the rape is not strong enough or lacks skill, so there are still people who are opposed to it and are unhappy. This statement cannot be called untrue. You have indeed failed to improve my character and made me suffer because I did not accept you. But I am afraid that the inspiration given to me at this time is not that I hope you can succeed in improving my character, but the opposite. A SIGN I have something I would like to say about the discipline and hard work aspects you mentioned. I'm Chinese, and religion hasn't been as significant in my experience as yours, but shame is certainly significant. I'm guessing that people - including me, of course - spend an astonishing amount of time (and in many cases more than work) playing with electronics has something to do with some shame. Of course, shame is more about what others impose on you, especially considering that you can't leave the classroom at will when the teacher is reprimanding the students, giving motivational speeches, emphasizing discipline and saving time, and promoting rules and punishments. I feel that China's primary and secondary schools are to a certain extent like schools in other parts of the world, but also like religions in other parts of the world. In addition to planting the seeds of hard work and punishing laziness, they also sow the seeds of rules and discipline - although they are not really clearly linked to hard work (in principle, people can also work hard when they don't follow schedules, clothing, etc., and the punishment for laziness doesn't have to be based on rules). Did I become a harder worker? No. Maybe it was because of my anger at being restrained, or because I spent 4 years lazily in college, or, as people say, the result of a lack of discipline. People will talk about whether you want to mitigate it to gain the other person's buy-in, or break the other person's rebellion, or use some combination of the two, if it's not as effective because of "rebellion". People seem to live a fake life, not making choices for themselves, but confusing the difficulties of real life with the punishment that others deliberately give them when them not really hurting others. I think a culture that doesn't distinguish between the two is an immoral culture - of course, if you distinguish between the two and support the purpose of constraining others without them harming other people as their "character enhancement" or for some other purpose, then it's also an immoral culture. I can't prove that this will do more harm than good, but I love freedom - or more accurately, hate the opposite. I guess it's mostly American here. Then I want to say to you: I don't believe in the vast majority of constraints on children, I don't think adults should have that much power, and I believe that children's freedom is also important. Most parents probably don't think the same way I do. If, unfortunately, things go as I have already mentioned, I have an indulgent desire: I want every child to have some at least a few months, without facing any tasks, constraints, disciplines, reprimands or punishments, just playing with their phones for weeks on end, and, I advise them to think about their freedom, to be able to feel that they should be allowed to have freedom even as children, and, I advise - only advise - to make some attempts to learn without constraints and completely as willing freely. If I am to speak to people here, I can't use expressions like these. Some children are ashamed of any words, even "rebellious" words; because any words will be used to "spur" them. I have to be more rebellious and angrier to express my opinions, and be to its full. When Chinese children see a sign on a train, they will feel ashamed that they have not worked hard to learn geography and calligraphy, just because the sign is a place name printed out by a printer. This is far from a true intrinsic motivation; shame is far from a free choice that a person can control at will. HOW DOES MULTICULTURALI SM RELATE TO FREEDOM? (PART OF THE STORY) When people are little, they think, "If being rebellious is going to make me feel worse, why not try to change my own psychology." When they grow up, they think, "Since I'm not a kid anymore, why don't I push them?" The hope lies in rebellious kids having their own culture in which people comfort and express approval of each other, don't interact with offensive other cultures, and ignore some facts - if we're not sure about being comfortable and rebellious even after realizing facts that don't fit or potentially don't fit our ideas. I don't have to be willing to get into the broader politics, but the government is lecturing the people, like a parent lecturing a child, and like an Asian parent lecturing a child, mixing "the government has to protect the people from self-indulgence" with "the government has to propagate altruism among the people", and apparently the two are being intentionally confused as one thing. As a Chinese, I have never felt Western culture to have a "rational root", but rather something to do with rebellious children. However, egoism has never had a "rational root" either, but an adult who does not give wholeheartedly to others is unlikely to feel much shame about it. From a very young age, I longed for teachers and schools that wouldn't punish me or make demands and rules on me, but would help me get better (if they insisted) on my terms, and I would have been able to comfortably expose my vulnerabilities and laziness, comfortably deal with problems, and skip over inefficient learning in that kind of relationship. I was a "character enhancement" person as a child, but only insofar as I did things to my own psyche; I objected to that kind of coercion from the first time I encountered someone who said they were going to enhance my character through discipline and punishment. They emphasized reverence for discipline, for punishment, the majesty of the teacher. I could not prove that their approach was harmful to my long- GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME term interests, although even then I believed that even if it was beneficial, I should be free to reject it. Their claims that what adults do is "thoughtful" and based on "deep traditions and cultures" and that seemingly unnecessary things can also "foster respect for rules" and "enhance character" have given me a lot of painful pauses. At the other end of the spectrum, I want to be free of all constraints, not just unhelpful constraints. The pain of being forced to "regulate myself" and of rationality's incessant questioning of why I don't do better (even if that "better" takes into account the cost of rationality itself) had given me a strong intuition. This intuition was a passion for impulse, for freedom from reason, and for the freedom to make one's own choices without interference. As opposed to what they did to me, I naturally felt a longing for intimate and unaugust relationships at the time. What I learned about the gay movement that was happening in other parts of the world after I went to middle school, while having nothing to do with my situation, served as a symbol, as a phrase, that was of tiny comfort to me. It also inspired me to talk to my peers more, to try to use the words of my peers to counteract the bad feelings that rules, punishments and teachers' criticisms had caused me. However, I didn't get a lot of comfort from my peers as they generally approved of the teacher. I hate and object against schools. WHEN RETAILING CAN EXPRESS AN OBJECTION I remembered something. I remembered so many, many things, like those teachers who said that false information proved that children needed discipline to improve their scientific literacy, and how many, many ways of thinking became comforting and then exploited by the teachers or created more selfcontradiction. For example, a teacher used a conspiracy theory argument one day to support discipline and punishment of students, you go home, hug yourself, cry, comfort yourself and say "conspiracy theories are bad", the next day the teacher says that the prevalence of conspiracy theories proves a lack of discipline and punishment of the students, and a student tells the teacher that his statement the day before was a conspiracy theory, and then the teacher will say that "in order to avoid such inconsistencies in human beings, one needs discipline and restraint during one's time as a student", and that "this reflective nature of the student is proof of the success of his education and of the depth of Chinese culture embedded in discipline", but "If you continue to be disruptive and interfere with the normal management of the class, then you will be punished" and the last sentence does not become the first sentence of the teacher's response proving the virtue of mercy. A PART OF REBELLIOUSNESS Constraints are devastating. Being forced to do one thing can cause you to be unwilling to do five things you would otherwise do yourself. You are confronted with your rebellion. Suppose you are also forced to do those five things, because anger is an uncomfortable feeling, or you still try to accept the five things you would have done, you decide to comfort your rebellion. Or, you're just thinking subconsciously. Whatever the case may be, you realize that you can convince yourself that you can study hard for the good of others and not just yourself, you can try to convince yourself that teachers and parents are your employers, and you can try to convince yourself that you wouldn't actually do those five things assuming no one is pushing you. Aware of these things frightens you, because your anger does not want to go away, and because these things may be the reason why others are willing to accept being constrained; whether consciously or not, you always inevitably ask yourself why you can't be as obedient as they are. Another reason to feel fear is that you fear that accepting them will lead you to inadvertently accept what you are not forced to do, or to miss out on ideas that can be used to try and persuade the person constraining you. People criticize you every day with inadequate arguments, and you reflect on it with a hundred times the thought they did when they criticized you, so that you don't feel as bad as being criticized. Lying to yourself or not thinking enough will not make you feel good either, because (1) they will point out tomorrow where you are deceiving yourself or underconsidering (albeit in the middle of 50 criticisms with insufficient reasons), and (2) one of the main reasons why this kind of thinking makes you feel better is that you use your thinking to persuade the person who restricts you in your imagination (although this communication does not have a chance to happen), and false or insufficient reflection does not reassure you. I just thought of something else. Some people say that school teaches self-discipline. I don't support unnatural consequences by any means, whether or not primary and secondary schools can teach selfdiscipline. To take a step back, I don't think forcing a person can teach a person self-discipline. And even if it worked, it wouldn't be necessary, because it's perfectly possible for a child to learn self-discipline by facing natural consequences after work - if one has to use the expression "learning self-discipline". I'm in college now, and the busiest days of college aren't GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME nearly as busy as 1/3 of primary and secondary schools here, and most importantly, no one punishes or shames me. I still have to do things to graduate, and I have to push myself to do things sometimes. I realised that I could say to myself, "I went through so much in primary and secondary school, I just need to emulate what I did then, but do college tasks as I wish." That thought really scared me. Although, I could argue that just because I push myself in this way doesn't mean I'm in favour of primary and secondary school; I'd rather I didn't have primary and secondary school experiences to draw on, but primary and secondary school experiences are a fait accompli. But, no, I'm not going to rush myself by recalling my primary and secondary school experiences. To take a step back, a month or two of experience can provide experience, not 12 years of primary and secondary school. Taking another step back, one may feel rebellious and try to deliberately lose the ability to exercise self-discipline that one gets from primary and secondary school. People can be so in love with freedom that after they get it, they still, sometimes, choose to destroy what others have built in them that could have been of use to them. WHEN CRITICISM TURNS BACK INTO INFORMATION/ ADVICE As far as one's own affairs are concerned, criticism should not be imposed on others, but should only appear when people actively seek it. But the trauma caused by the school and some parents is so great that people don't use the word "criticism" when they ask friends or experienced people if there is anything wrong with what they are doing. People must put an end to the status quo, stop the unsought comments, and let criticism reappear only in situations where people actively seek it. "LEARNING STATE" AND CONSERVATIVES I think what the Chinese call children's "learning state" refers to "just do it, don't use your attention to feel dissatisfied." This is also the attitude of conservatives in various countries. The risk that removing unnecessary restraints from a child might lead to the child becoming aware of unsatisfactoriness is considered to outweigh the benefits of conserving more freedom. WHY CULTURES ARE IMMORAL Chinese are the best at accepting the persecution of others. So I'm not qualified to be a Chinese. Feel that there is no point in a constraint? Just call it character enhancement. Freedom-loving people will say that character enhancement is a guise for meaningless constraints, and freedom-haters will say that there are no meaningless constraints, because all restraints are character enhancement. Immorality happens when there are a handful of freedom-loving people who should be shamed and whose characters need to be improved in a freedomhating culture, because your existence provides their victims. However, a culture of morality has not yet been born. Because even those cultures where people allow others not to lose themselves ignore the fact that the expression "losing oneself" is meaningless without the constant demands for the character improvement of others in the first place. WHY DID WE HATE CONSERVATIVES IN THE FIRST PLACE? The Mental Health Forum is a Western cultural invasion because it makes people think about things that make them feel bad instead of focusing on improving their character in the vast and profound Chinese culture, and it is a cultural weapon used by Western forces to undermine the character of the Chinese in order to suppress China, as evidenced by the high suicide rate caused by their own unrestricted freedom. "ADAPTING TO SOCIETY" Why should a person go to school every day, even if he wants to study on his own that day, or simply feels that he does not need to learn more on that day... People just "accept", "adapt" or "acquiesce" to this, which makes me feel disturbed... You can't say it's "adapting to society". If a person wants to participate in such a job, simulating such a life a month or two in advance is called adaptation; simulating such a life more than ten years in advance is just stupid and unnecessary.  ANGER AS PUNISHMENT The fact that a reprimand can be a punishment certainly has the relatively plain "let you find out what's bad about yourself" part of it, but it's also saying, "I know you won't accept this, but you still have self-contradiction, so you're going to feel bad about it, and I'm going to use that to punish you, and I'm even going to use your feelings of anger and rebellion to punish you. Make you feel annoyed due to your anger and rebellion against me as a punishment." From punishing one's rebellion in order to avoid one feeling rebellious, to using one's rebellion as a punishment for him. TRADITIONAL CULTURE You know, when someone criticizes your views and ideologies every day because you haven't read a lot of traditional culture classics, you can really get caught up in self-contradiction and anger. When you leave those people, you find that everything is fine. I guess the other option is to work overtime to read the traditional cultural classics, and then argue with the adults that you read them, but still hold on to your views and ideologies, but to be honest, they don't care, they will still discipline you, and considering that the traditional cultural classics are basically praising the child's spirit of obedience, this is just not a good deal for you. They are really constantly trying to convince you that your point of view is the result of a bad character, something that needs to be improved, and cannot be used as a basis for decision-making. For example, they just say that video games are drugs, so students' opinions are a manifestation of delirium and passivity, and that reading classic books or watching the news can prove that what they GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME are doing to students is reasonable, profound, and reflects the profound wisdom of traditional culture. I say this as if you really have a chance to make your point. No, you certainly don't get a chance to make your point unless you want to write a 5000-word self-criticism. They're doing "preventative character development" or something. I remember people saying that children shouldn't know about metal commemorative coins because "'commemorative coins' are an unconventional use of money, and this unconventional suggestion is not good for the child's development". I also remember my high school teacher reprimanding us because she wanted to counteract the "psychological turmoil caused by the replacement of the trash cans in the class." It's hard to prove that their claims are not true, and the trouble is that I can say that what they're doing is ridiculous, but people don't necessarily have to reduce the criticism and punishment of their children, they can just point the criticism and punishment at not studying hard, from "the turmoil in the minds of students caused by garbage cans" or something like that. "You use the emoji in the forum as a reply to me, aren't you afraid that this unserious behavior has eroded your habits and character? Not to mention that emoji further strengthens the degeneration PORKIFIABLE of people's ability to express themselves in words. These people who do not understand the breadth and depth of traditional culture will benefit from being reprimanded, rather than lazily using this mental health forum that leads people into frivolity." Then, you really hope that the person who said this is just disappointed that the people on the forum don't care about him, and not really intent on uplifting your life, otherwise it will be too painful for you. Then you'll find that even if the other person is just unhappy with the forum, you still feel bad about yourself. You want to convince others more thoroughly not to reprimand you, not based on "sometimes others are dissatisfied with themselves and don't really care about you", and this "drilling" and pursuit of thoroughness of you is considered a rebellious ill, further justifying their education on you. When I see a person lamenting that abused children still have a hard time distinguishing them from discipline in adulthood, I just want to say that there really is no such distinction and that I have more faith in (even the child's) right to self-determination. ORGASM I remember when I told my parents that the school was terrible, they told me to study hard so that I could become the Secretary of Education in the future and make a difference. Also, they wanted me to accept school as it was in order to study hard and reach that goal. So that you can see why sex becomes a symbol of some kind of self-liberation. Other approaches towards indulgence may still involve something that requires planning and effort, orgasm is the closest thing to indulgence that doesn't require any effort. IT'S NOT LACK OF INNOVATION; IT'S CALLED INSANITY. Attention is an issue, I guess? But some people don't say it outright. People are like, "Let's not talk about the whole letting kids choose whether to go to school or not every day thing, so that kids will accept going to school in order to see their peers and not think of any other possibilities (even though they must have thought of other possibilities on their first day of school)." It's such an obvious thing. I don't know if people really can't think of other possibilities or if they just avoid talking about it. The most outrageous thing is that the child must be able to think of other possibilities, but is certainly afraid to talk about it. The kid has been doing this for over a decade and the parents haven't thought of any other possibilities. And the child is afraid to talk about it for over a decade. GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME People are afraid to even try. People are afraid of their children tasting freedom. Where you are, it doesn't matter what's taught in school for a month or two months or six months, but people still don't try. It has nothing to do with lack of innovation; it's called insanity. But it's not insanity for a child. Since you are asking him to do something, you must be thoughtfully improving their character. A child would think this way. People see dropouts failing, so they support the schools. But what is clear is that either people would rather fail than continue learning, or staying in school is a prerequisite for a parent's willingness to support his child's learning. "LIVE IN THE MOMENT" The truth is, rebellion isn't just about short-term gain. If it is the whole rebellion, then I should be playing computer games right now instead of talking to you about these. As another example, if rebellion is purely for short-term gain, there is no reason for a child to rebel because it would lead to them being punished to the detriment of their short-term gain. You could certainly argue that the desire to express anger outweighs the pain of being punished and therefore represents their short-term interests. However, I like another way of saying that rebellion is the pursuit of freedom from the constraints of others. Because if I use the first definition, I seem to be suggesting that parents can compensate for their child's short-term interests in other ways (e.g., a buffet) and continue their discipline of their child, while still counting as permitting the child's rebellion. Which obviously wouldn't be to my liking. The Chinese don't think so. What do the Chinese mean when they say live in the moment? The Chinese mean that you live in the moment in order to GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME still maintain the fear of being punished, in order not to rebel for your freedom. Of course I wouldn't say it's my obligation, otherwise I'd have to still feel bad because I didn't study hard enough to be the Secretary of Education. BEFORE DINNER I just heard someone shouting outside. I went out to look for them and didn't find the person who shouted. Perhaps the situation was that the man's intuition told him that he feels quite a bit of pain and that things aren't worth it anymore, but he questioned why he couldn't take in more and "elevate his character." I just went to call out, trying to find him. I didn't know what words to use. I could have yelled, "Anyone there?", but it sounded like I was trying to reprimand him to get him to accept something. I could yell, "Are you okay?", but I don't mean for him to stick around or "improve his character" in order to be more "okay" ten years later. I just want him to have choices now, to feel better now, and not by "accepting" something he doesn't like now. He'll be home before long, probably feeling good about dinner and playing on his phone in the middle of the night. Maybe the person who yelled wasn't a rebellious child, and then this thing wouldn't matter much to me. LEFTHANDEDNESS AND DISOBEDIENCE School is the worst place. You can't choose where to sit or you'll be punished. If you move the desk, the teacher scolds you like crazy. Not to mention other 1000 rules and homework. If that teacher didn't like where you placed your books, or if your foreign language book appeared on your desk during math class, he started yelling at you for your low character and then threatened to use discipline to improve your character. Or he asks you to do a certain practice problem and you're reading some other part of the book or working on some other problem, and then you're threatened and they say they're going to punish you. I am shocked at the matter that someone would have the desire to dictate every move someone else makes. PORKIFIABLE The classroom has two doors. They specify which door you go through. And then you ask why. Then they say that you should be grateful for having a house instead of being rained on, and also that without rules society would collapse, and also that he is shocked that you brought this up and thinks that you lack discipline and that your character is going down the drain. I can't prove him wrong about those statements. It's unlikely that there's a study to look at the effect on character of walking through two doors or one. And even if there were a study that showed that walking through one door had a better effect on character than walking through two doors, what would that mean? Also, there might be something taped to the wall. Even if the students don't like that thing, you can't remove it. And, for example, the tape came off one of the corners of that thing, and at that time the students were scared. They were afraid that if they taped it back on, then they were moving something they weren't supposed to; but if they didn't tape it back on, it was a lack of collective responsibility. You do not like that thing, so that means you may wish to take it off, but you have no way to take it off, so that makes you a little bit conflicted, and you somehow feel as if you should put the tape back on and win the teacher's heart. It was then that the teacher, GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME seeing that the thing had lost a corner, scolded us with a shocked look on her face, saying that we were cowardly and depraved, and that truly courageous people should carefully tape it back on to prevent it from falling off again, and then began to bemoan our lack of social responsibility. That taped thing was probably an inspirational quote or something. So you might want to use that excuse to rip it out, but you're afraid that your teacher will do a motivational speech along the way when she glues it back in. If you're resisting the urge to rip it down in case your teacher gives a motivational speech tomorrow, why don't you try to like that motivational quote and develop the character to work hard to prepare for 20 years from now? In a school like that, you'd be pestered with similar thoughts basically every hour. WHAT ARE PEOPLE ARGUING ABOUT WHEN ARGUING ABOUT OPTIMISM AND PESSIMISM (Part of the story) Some people want mental illness rates to be higher, or suicide rates to be higher, because they think it would lead to less discipline. Some want the opposite because they fear someone intends to lower these things through disciplinary methods. From the perspective of supporting their wishes, we do not necessarily want these two indicators to decrease, because a decrease in these two indicators may mean that they are changing, or it may mean that the things they want to change are changing. GLIMPSES OF REBELLIOUSNESS AND SHAME Suppose there is news, in fact there is such news, saying that the academic level of Chinese students is high. Some people will like this news because they think it means we can relax our discipline; some people will not like this news because they think this success will become an argument to support the discipline of Chinese students. So you can see, there's definitely a lot of debate about patriotism. If you take pleasure in a bad situation, people seem justified in hating you. One excuse is that you're not rejoicing in a bad situation, you're just emphasizing the bad aspects of the situation to make people better. There are two things that are ironic. One is that you are saying that you are doing a kind of encouragement, but in fact you are opposed to something similar; the other is that you can realize that emphasizing bad situations comes from being happy about bad situations rather than other reasons. It actually means that you feel the same as him. Another similar thing is optimism and pessimism. Some people hate optimistic people because optimistic people say things should tend to be resolved by being more optimistic rather than changing the situation according to his wishes; some people hate pessimistic people because pessimistic people say things are bad and they need to suffer for the sake of the future. PORKIFIABLE But this cannot be said directly. You can't say you hate optimistic people or pessimistic people, what can you say? You can only criticize those optimistic people and pessimistic people for not being consistent with the facts, or their character needs to be improved. You are their character enhancer and therefore the good side. People express their emotions in a distorted way. It can be difficult to express your emotions openly in an environment where others are against you, and you won't receive support even if you express them. But the risk of using subterfuge and distorted expressions of emotion is that the words may come back against your will, or add more complexity to the argument, and complexity may not necessarily favor nonmainstream views. I'm talking about the complexity in the argument. As for the complexity of the matter itself, it may actually favor non-mainstream views. The author's bio can be found on OneDrive: https://1drv.ms/f/s! AoS3CwuJesEcjGGxQgc2T_GJ55el Note: This book is not character enhancement. I don't read much. If that sentence makes you feel less shameful about not reading books. Note: Early learning is indeed one of the uses of this book. 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